©1984 Andrew Calhoun, recorded on Where Blue Meets Blue.
I'm gonna take a little bit of knowledge, I'm gonna turn it all into honey,
Gonna take 4 years of college, gonna turn 'em all into money.
My father is a big-shot company man, my mother was a Playboy Bunny,
Son of a bitch, when I get rich, I'm gonna live where the weather is sunny,
Live where the weather is sunny.
While out hunting skunk in the gooseberry bog, we came upon an Indian ruin,
Full of buffalo hides and a drum made of logs, and a pot to make Indian stew in.
Just Missy and me in our little tepee, who knows what we were doin',
Till the bulldozer came and they flattened our game, just to put another house or two in.
I am never goin' back to school, please don't ask me mister,
My teacher told the principal, all about the time that I kissed her.
Dean Brown called me down to the office and he said "You better keep your dirty hands off my sister!"
He rapped my knuckles and he boxed my ears, gave me a bloody nose and a blister.
I'm goin' down to the opera house, gonna listen to a real fine singer,
Her throat is gold and her heart is gold, and she's got a gold ring on her finger.
Her voice so ripe and round and clear, that it heals my heart just to hear her sing,
She'll catch my eye with a wink so sly, singing, "I'll marry you in the winter,"
"I'll marry you in the winter."
If I blow a little smoke sometimes, I hope that won't upset ya,
Like the truth might sound like a joke sometimes, I promise that I'll never forget ya.
I've got to run, goodbye so long, with the best of luck and you betcha,
I'll meet you back in the laundry room, if God nor the devil don't getcha,
If God nor the devil don't getcha.