It's Not You That I'm Leaving

©1990 Andrew Calhoun, recorded on Phoenix Envy.

It's not you that I'm leaving 
When I get on that plane 
And I go sailing through the air 
Back to my home again 
And if that plane should chance to crash 
Go down in a fiery ball 
The flames that turn that plane to ash 
Won't touch my love at all 

Forgive these frequent silences 
For when I fade away 
The reason I'm so quiet is 
I've got so much to say 

And I know you cannot carry me 
As I cannot carry you 
It's just this love for you 
That I can carry through 
Through these long planes of nightmare 
That my own fears reflect 
And those old tortured lying roads 
That your piercing truths reject 

I'm searching for a better way 
And a real place to live 
That's big enough for both of us 
And all we must forgive 
And if I cannot build that house 
All up upon dry land 
I'll say a prayer and turn away 
And let go of your hand 

But in the house of my heart 
You've got the warmest bed 
You've got the softest pillow 
To lay your weary head 
And in the house of my heart 
There's room to fight and pray 
It's deep enough and wide enough 
For all we have to say